Redux
You as my Lover
acting like you care
You liked to Hover
we made a great pair
But you were a Shover
found out too late
So I ran away for Cover
to escape this fate
Originally published 4/15/2019 on I Write Her. Tried to duplicate here, but the formatting is different from when I initially posted it.
Redux
my past returns
up in my future
like hot juice
down my throat
it burns
this becomes something else
tainted and wrong
desperate attempts
at rising above
at feeling less defiled
sullied and broken
once again
first time, shame on him
second time, shame on me
a third time won’t happen
Originally posted 4/14/2019 on I Write Her.
sorrow evident
nature mimics the heart’s aches
hard to hide sadness
is it giving up if
the fucks have disintegrated
when the situation has
broken your mind
your body
and your feelings
until numbness
is all there is left
when something is so undesirable
the outcome seems inevitable
prudent even
Redux
I
can see
the better
life shining clear,
can almost taste it.
But it’s just out of reach.
Down again, gave in again
to the temptations of my sins.
Every so often I regret it.
Shame, guilt, anger, sickness, hunger for death.
Self-medication, self-flagellation;
It’s all I seem to know anymore.
The bruises of the bottle stain
my life a shade of dingy
and gray in this bright world.
Can I escape it?
I would like to
just get out
of this
hell.
Originally posted 4/7/2019 on I Write Her.
Redux
Love me so hard
I forget the pain
I came with.
Free the me
who wants
to return love.
It’s there deep within.
I promise.
I have it to give.
Please occupy
the space
between my molecules.
Filling this
empty,
tainted soul.
Please help me
to release
these demons.
To make the room
inside for all
you can share.
Your strength
meets mine
and helps me rise.
When you’re where
I finally leave;
I’ll be here, dear.
Then it’s my turn.
Your slide to the dark,
my cross to bear.
Originally posted 4/6/2019 on I Write Her.
we bend under pressure
and sustained battery to the psyche
and yet
ironically, those “contributions” can raise the quality of life
our troubles and the suffering surrounding us
can become extinct when the beauty of love shows up
when we treasure the existence of humanity
and gift it what it needs
those weakened
can begin again with renewed strength
the external cold
attempts to cross boundaries
internal warmth saves
**NOTE – I feel like I’ve done a SenHai Saturday poem in one, not two.
Redux
I long for the restful places
where the pain
is expelled or soothed
every thought on paper
brings a downturn of
painful emotions
an uplifting
into understanding
and peace
from hurtful emotions
a broadening
of my horizon
when I let go of
expectations
easing into serenity
and calm
finding
my happy place
Originally posted 3/24/2019 on I Write Her 3/24/12019.
i can feel us drift from the magic
our love becoming a relic
the stars once brilliant,
are now dim
the water we swim in
becoming bloody inky
the beast boils within
a demise beginning
it tracks as the light of love extinguishes
no more words will change the truth
no longer the hunter of the exquisite
i confess disillusionment
for this holy union
as i hear the echo of desires long gone
flames wishing to re-ignite
yet dampened by the inability to catch on a spark
a reality experienced by so many of us
over and over
until we just can’t anymore
I Write Her 