The Art Of Being Self-Absorbed

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I was once called a narcissist. Unbelievable coming from a 30+ years old friend. 

I do understand what a narcissist is now, as I lived with one for 18 years. It happened to be my mother. I also know that I have been influenced by her behavior which in turn could lead me to mimic it at times. Understanding who she was and the impressions she left, forced me to look at myself diligently. There are many articles and so much information about this personality type. All of which I feel the need to read, to this day. Fear of becoming her is the biggest motivator. I’m ensuring I do not ever become the worst of who my mother was.

Bottom line, that ex-friend was full of shit. She was deflecting because, in reality, the narcissist in our relationship was her. I had basically traded one unhealthy relationship for another. A knee-jerk reaction, just reaching out for what was familiar. And it took me forever to figure that out.

Knowing what a narcissist is now has helped me understand why I have allowed so many others over the years with the same tendencies to become friends with me. They enmeshed themselves in my life so effortlessly only to watch as they abruptly and harshly disappointed me. They left some deep marks.

All have been hard lessons.

Needless to say, I work hard now at not repeating history.

Shhhh…

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“No one can know, Tom. I’m afraid of what will happen!”
“Don’t you think I know that, Sherry?”

Both quietly uncomfortable carrying their heavy load. The sweat on their brow evident from the efforts of hauling this load to the pier.

Pausing briefly, they looked at each other.

“Are you ready, Sherry?”
“Yeah, let’s do this, Tom.”

They watched as the suitcase dropped in the water. Bubbles immediately appeared after it plunged into the water. The bricks helped to force it further down.

“I feel like I just lost my best friend, Tom.”
“Well, yeah, because you just did, Sherry!”

Inspired by Reena’s Exploration Challenge – Week 60

Convening The Troops

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The country is divided – rich vs. poor, black vs. white, men vs. women – freedom wanted, but only oppression is alive and well. The guilty get a pass; the innocent convicted of nothing. There is an unease permeating throughout. All inhabitants challenged like never before in this reign of rich, white men’s egos. The political climate of today’s world has all teetering and scared. The tension so thick, cutting it only adds more strength to the day’s events.

Scene 1 – Random coffee shop in the US

Friend 1 – “Oh, man, this sucks! Waah, Waah. I don’t know how much more I can take of this! Waah, Waah. I’m sooooo tired of feeling dragged down. Waah, Waah. I don’t like it! Waah, Waah. Will it ever end??”

Friend 2 – “Give it time, Friend 1. You do realize things sometimes have to get worse before they get better! Good can and will triumph eventually! It will all be okay. I’m sure of it. You need to resign yourself to things taking their own time.”

Friend 3 – “Oh, Friend 2, you are such a delusional twit! THIS chaos IS the end of our country as we know it. It’s gone to hell in a handbasket. Life IS OVER and will never be better again, EVAH!”

Friend 4 – “I don’t understand?? I loved this country! Fought for it, stood for it, pledged my commitment to it and now it just feels like a betrayal! Friend 3, what did I do wrong? I gave it all I was supposed to and all that I get back is something that doesn’t even remotely resemble the bond we had before.”

Friend 5 – “OMGosh you guys! You don’t realize what is happening right now at all! How can you not see that we are Making America Great Again?? Our current state is the best thing that could have happened to this country! I pledge my allegiance till the day I die. And so should you!”

Friend 6 – “Go ahead. You sit here and lament, thinking that time will heal everything, angrily do nothing, wallow in your misery, or proudly pound your chest. Just know that we are done! I can’t believe I’m friends with people who are so selfish, blind, apathetic, and just plain ignorant. How in the hell did that ever happen? I can’t and won’t remain quiet in the face of our demise! While I go fight for what’s right, remember it’s because you don’t know how! Good-bye!” **Stands up and leaves dramatically

Fade to black

 

Inspired by Reena’s Exploration Challenge – #Week 58 – “Using Keywords”

Hope you all have enjoyed this short fiction/non-fiction story using all the keywords. Can you identify where they are being used? I hope so! 🙂

What Emerges

We see each other.

Though we don’t know beyond what stands before us.

The reflection is a fairy tale; the image, a mask of well-being.

Or it’s a nightmare played out while awake.

More likely, people pass by being barely noticeable.

Understand that the substance of lives are not predicted in the first glance.

Let’s take the time to watch as the bios unfold slowly.

Look inside.

And find the essential being within.

Our Pain

 

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Instantly life pirouettes from gratifying to suffering.

We stand defiantly watching as uncaring nature delivers its blows.

We hear words spoken carelessly influencing scarred individuals.

We suffer from the ravages of aging and illness.

We have enemies and lovers, intentionally or not, damage our hearts.

We ache as good friends with kind souls die and leave us.

We battle with inferior people foisting their rottenness unto us.

We deal with forceful, unpredictable accidents as they tragically disfigure futures.

We hope for respite.

We wonder when it will end.

But we know.