Finally Up

“Do you miss me?”
“Actually? Not really. My life’s gotten better without you.”

“Self-harming again?”
“No, but I may take it up again to hasten my demise.”

vacillating between extremes
a predicament to be sure
my decisions gave me freedom
my loneliness demanded a solution
one minute, i’m whole
the next, i’m a mess
gave you up
because being here felt like it was killing me
prompting decisions
the poison continues to infiltrate
but answers arrive
healing has taken its time
while love continues to do its magic
i’m lifted exquisitely out of my misery
time and evaluation
gave me freedom

Your Days

it was coming
i knew it with certainty
and distractions from the truth
failed me

when the phone call came
i braced myself in steely opposition
hardening my body against the cruel words
i was about to hear

she’s dead

only screams of sorrow
and heavy sobs of tears escaped me
i was now in a world
which felt empty and hollow

her eagerness to listen
her kind and gentle ways gone
the smiles and caring on her face
would happen no more

i pushed the receiver from my ear
as if to push away the truth
but knowing that mourning had begun
a new reality, one hard to face

feeling empty without her presence
i was born into a lonely place
her voice and body only in memories now
i miss her grace, her love and her acceptance

time took forever to heal the loss i felt
the place in my heart where she took up residence
darkened, and shriveled up
the air thicker as i inhaled only tears

the light she shone came to an end
but the warmth she gave continues
i always try to celebrate the day she was born
but the day she left, i mourn

#Whatdoyousee
Image Credit – Angéle Kamp @ Unsplash

I thank VJ and Sadje for inspiring thoughts of my special friendship. Guess I needed a good cry today. I dedicate this piece to Bana – a wonderful human being and such a catalyst for good – she will always be remembered with a smile and a tear.

Reblog – LIFE LIVES ON by Lorraine Lewis

Faced with the hardships of life, we must go on.

Many
Voices clamour
Until my head jangles
Like a badly tuned orchestra
Today
I saw
Once again men in black coats, move,
Stately, sombre, until
Life receded
Death reigned

Panic
Struck my raw heart
My soul taken up, black
Was this day, until red appeared
And then
I knew
That there is still life to be lived,
In the midst of which death
Interrupts, flows,
Calls us

Softly
Life caresses
My face, swollen, weeping,
Telling me that life will live on,
Because
That’s what
It does, and death cannot conquer
That which lives for ever
Beyond the veil

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Richer

Inspired by Sadje’s Sunday Poser #3 & The Sunday Whirl #483

with wind prodding me towards home
tender reminders and gratitude 
fill my essence as

feed on the love shown me 
no frill or pomp and circumstance
nor silver spoon of connections born 

my friends, my tribe
they flow alongside my road traveled
no words mince, no hearts break

i transfer a kiss to my finger
with a smile and gratitude, place it firmly
on the lips of my family

Reblog – New Leaves Wait to Grow by Ken G.

And the cycle of life continues…

rivrvlogr

New Leaves Wait to Grow

It was an easy decision for me, when I decided to move to Missouri. I was following my heart to be with the woman I love. If we were going to be together, it was much easier for me to make the move than it would have been for her. Still not yet sixty (I had retired at fifty-three), I had no job to hold me back.

I gave a lot of thought to being away from my children and reasoned that it would be no different than if they were to move away after completing college. My eldest son had attended university in Cleveland and had a job there as a computer engineer. My other son still lived in the Buffalo area, working in IT for a web hosting firm, and wasn’t afraid to travel himself. Meanwhile, my daughter was in college, and there…

View original post 269 more words

Published at Pure Haiku – Arturina Theme!

I thank Freya Pickard again for selecting a few of my pieces to have included in this theme, here is the first one. The second will be published in December. Stay tuned for that! The Arturina theme was such an inspiration, so many exquisite images!

You can read the piece by clicking here.

Please do go read all the other wonderful submissions. They are all amazing!!

Carolyn Crossley

Divinity

You live in me, so
deep I neither hear nor see,
but know – you are there.
You have been there from the start.
In the gaps I feel your pulse.

Silence

I hear you in the
deepest silence, you are the
heart of my spirit.

Love

Universal love
links us all together like
hearts beat together.

The Witch Within

We are by Goddess
blesséd, she who lives within;
wakes the witch in us.
Reconnecting us to our
roots, chakras and ancestors.

~~~

Carolyn Crossley©TheVixenOfVerse has been a poet since 2002. She originally used poetry as therapy after losing her younger son to heroin. She now concentrates on her blog: backfromdarknesstolight.com and will publish her first anthology in 2021.

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