The harshness of pain and the lightness of release, a constant cycle we as humans endure. Living requires courage and determination, or?
Do you hear it?
Relief sounds like
a girl’s slip
a bird’s wing
your eye lashes fluttering
against your blushing cheek
Do you hear it?
Suffering sounds like
cloth pulled by stick across dirt floor
chalk pressed violent into board
fingers opening blouses raggedly
your chest bone protrudes
more than the year before
Do you hear it?
already exhausted upon awakening
the day begins anew
while the brain is slow
the body is even slower
what weighs me down
isn’t easily lifted
for my body and soul
took a deep hit
just trying to stay afloat for now
living is on hold
when the dark veil has lifted
and the heart is healed
i’ll arise more determined
with hope in my eyes
I am so pleased that Senior Editors Candice Louisa Daquin and Kindra M. Austin, and Editor-in-Chief Christine E. Ray have accepted three of my pieces for this amazing Anthology! I submitted Downpour, Ennui, and Going Down hoping I adequately captured what they were looking for and they did! What a wonderful feeling!
This anthology is a collection of pieces which describe the experiences of “those who are living, or have struggled, with mental illness such as mood disorders, anxiety disorders, eating disorders, personality disorders, post-traumatic stress disorder, or psychotic disorders.” My experiences, and observations of others, with anxiety and depression over the years were the inspiration for pieces I wrote.
Indie Blu(e) Publishing has produced so many other noteworthy anthologies and publications. They feature many strong voices and talent. I highly recommend you check them out for yourself. The two books below also contain several pieces of mine.
I will keep you posted when the anthology is published sometime in the Spring of 2021!
like a candle melting
hot little piecemeal pontifications
emerge from between the edge of lips
they’ll singe and sting for a bit
one utterance forward and two psychosis’ back
to a place where anxiety takes the reigns again
add in a bit of depression
where the blackness overrides the chaos
sleep becoming a refuge
like a candle doused
this flame inside extinguished
a life rising up as dead-smelling smoke
only some children
can claim that life is easy
only some adults
have a life that is easy
for there are many whose dreams
shattered before their eyes
heartbreak and heartache
the sum of their existence
when what is spoken is not true
when deceit dominates
yet forgiveness is expected
escape to better living is excruciating
Reading this, in what I think the tempo requires, you can really feel the lethargy and depression in this piece. It totally resonates with some moments I’ve experienced in my own life, how about yours?
I don’t
think
I have
anything
to say
Today
Perhaps
there
will be
more
sorrow
Tomorrow
So I
will
wait to
pick up
my pen
Then
For I
fear I
wouldn’t
even
know how
Now
Is restoration ever possible? This piece highlights the depths we go to and quite possibly never recover from.
Nothing has been the same since you left.
I am far from myself.
Trying to be things I feel I cannot.
It isn’t what you would want from me.
You knew the real me. You had accepted it with open arms & wanted me to stay that way. It was something that should have been so easy to do.
In fact it was.
But it was not easy for me somehow.
Incompetent I am for failing to do a simple task.
How I wish I could revert to that last time we spoke. Had I known it would be the final time, my words would be rearranged to keep you. To give myself a final chance to prove myself.
Every time I look back I that day, I consider it one of my biggest failures.
Because time after that has me filled with so much regret for all of my…
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Feeling this one today. We are our own worst enemies at times. Thoughts?
there be no monsters
save those we gestate within
our demons inside
Worthy of sharing as so many I know have dealt with similar situations. Take care of yourself if you find yourself in a relationship like this.
How do I make you hear
Better still, understand
When my words fall
On deaf ears, am I
But a hum, or drone
You have so easily
Tuned out, turned off
Or is it you who simply
Does not care to listen
Muting the sounds
Too full of yourself
To admit wrong
Ignoring the signs
You need help
Or to notice
I am right
Here
©2019 Dorinda Duclos All Rights Reserved
Photo via Pixabay CC0
Motivation lacking, sign of the times.
