Gone Down

Inspired by Sadje’s What do you see #147

i watched the sun
slowly fade away
and everything around me
began to take on a dark hue

i experienced a sinking feeling
my body caving in on itself
the depression dragging me down

i yelled into the void
but no one could hear me

i couldn’t save myself

Off

lost in this mental quagmire
feeling it in my bones
thoughts run to escape the myths
created in my head
questions thick with sinew
yet the answers are willowy 
should i pray
and light three candles
as the glum begins trickling in

my spirits growl 
hearing the hum of birds
wishing for peace
in a world unbalanced

Reblogs – Kristin Kory & Christine Bolton

Whether childhood trauma, devastating unexpected events, dysfunctional upbringing, or the daily grind wearing you down — rest, gather your inner strength, and begin anew. Continue on as who you were meant to be before life intervened.

Song of Flames by Kristin Kory

They tell you to follow the sun
as if night isn’t upon you
as if the shadows aren’t real

but night is still upon you

The thing in your mouth, copper hush
rage whispers
silence screams
until you sing your song of flames:

Let them come
Oh, let them rage
Let them find me in the shadows
Let them say my name
And quake

They tell you to let go
as if you’ve unpacked your pain
as if you’ve poured it into the earth

but hell still sits in a suitcase

The thing in your belly, it knows
the magic lies in the coming apart
in the middle of the wreck
in your every season
and every room
it waits

Hurt is hard to feel
but still the wound must speak
and speak it does
before you heal

They tell you to sit on the moon
keep fishing dark skies for stars
as if hope isn’t hanging by a thread of nostalgia
as if you didn’t notice the rage behind the flowers
before they were plucked from your garden

but his hands are still entangled in your hair

The thing in your center, it calls
little by little
in waves
it comes

Pull up a chair, sorrow says
out of body, slip
you will rebuild yourself
but first, rest

Inner Child by Christine Bolton

I live life now  
as my inner child  
She who lived in  
secret for so long  
Never allowed  
to come out and play  
Words tied to her  
tongue left unsaid  
Perceptions wrong  
every time  
Assumptions skewed  
Questions unasked  
Until finally freed  
Now her poetry  
tells the story  
of who I am now  
Unafraid and fearless  
Forever young 

Hopelessness

Redux

in the clutches of this mental sinkhole
forced effort my only ally
my day is silent
with only slow tears and exhaustion
the bed, my refuge
the external world feels so far removed
from inside my womb of despair
dark, alone, and unwell
i need to stop sinking
or eventually, i will float

Reblogs – Cassa Bassa & Tom Alexander

Pain buckles your inner state making recovery incredibly difficult. With every last bit of strength you have, choose to heal instead. Live again.

Dark Mood by Cassa Bassa

My thoughts
get stuck
in a thick tar swamp
knowing
that I am drowning
further below
but not quite
the end

Struggling is useless
Letting go is impossible
Tangled in poison syrup

In pitch dark night sky
all the stars
give up on me
They blink out
So
I settle in
being lost
dying alive
alone

Fracture, Fill by Tom Alexander

Break it like a bone
let it jut from torn skin
it’ll be raw and sore
then snap it back in

Fracture, fill
repair and grow

Through the ache
the growth seems subtle
Once it’s healed
that muscle gets supple

Fracture, fill
repair and grow

You can’t guess the extent
to which you’re capable
without some months spent
feeling utterly breakable

Fracture, fill
repair and grow…

Rising Published on MasticadoresUSA!

Life is hard; we all know this. But I always hope that each of us retains a bit of hope and strength to get through the bad times. I’m sure that most of the readers who visit here, know that about me. This piece, which I’m so happy that Gabriela Milton, Editor of MasticadoresUSA, has accepted for publication, speaks about the heaviness of days gone wrong and the determination in spite of it. Enjoy!

Rising

already exhausted upon awakening
the day begins anew

while the brain is slow
the body is even slower

what weighs me down
isn’t easily lifted…

Please read the rest of the piece at MasticadoresUSA

Perhaps

the darkness in this room
matches my own
as i pull the covers tighter
wrapping up in this cocoon, my shield
i sink into black

time stands still
for more than the RDA
the bed, a safe space
insulates me with warmth not felt
for eons

through the haze of awakening
flickers of the past emerge in my dreams
dead friends come to life again
fun family vacation scenes from long ago
friendships once broken, repaired

a kaleidoscope vision of possibility
tugs at the seam of my current dimmed perspective
perhaps loosening the hold of the darkness
perhaps hopelessness will find the path to depart
perhaps dreams will become reality

NOTE: I am not experiencing these feelings at this time. And RDA is short for Recommended Daily Allowance. 🙂

My Black Heart

shielded by the dark
the frost turns to hard, clear ice
longing for some warmth

Bartholomew Barker inspired this piece from me with his prompt on Living PoetryMonday Poetry Prompt: Dark, Frost, Long on December 20, 2021 While his image would lead you to think about Winter, my mind went in a different direction. What does it bring up for you?

Cracked

Suliman Sallehi – Pexels

Inspired by Sadje’s What do you see #117

A serious reflection

i see our world as splitting up
coming apart at the seams
politics, pollution, people
tragedies galore

i don’t know how much longer
i can keep it together
teetering on the top of the world
looking down with grief

A funny take

I don’t know how much longer I can keep these two peaks together. My calf and thigh muscles are killing me! But I just can’t let the Earth split in two!