How We Become

our existence is pure chance
from the first breath to the last

…we begin to emerge

we reside in our hulls
as best we can

…we accept our fate

no destiny is foretold
it would be a lie

…we begin to build our futures

the influences we encounter
shape our course

...we put the pieces together

our existence in this world
a compilation of experiences

…we accept or reject what we encounter

this being of our own making
punctuated by false starts

…we are the entity we discovered

years of facing trials
and joys captured in moments

…we become

a lifetime to savor through memories
a person determined

Thank you, Akshita, for inspiring these thoughts!

Wish List

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As we’re growing up, we continually shape and define what’s important to us. For me, this was always an easy task as I continually challenged and questioned the world around me. Consistently prioritizing and seeking fairness may be what gave me a strong drive for justice.

I recently came across something I’d written a long time ago. I may have been in my thirties at the time. Not quite sure what prompted the thoughts initially. Even though written over twenty years ago, the original statements remain the same. These are the relatively few things I think I need to stay a calm individual with others. To stay sane, well, that’s another story for another day.

My wishlist:

  • DO what you say. It speaks volumes of you as a person that I can depend on you.
  • Smile when I smile at you. It does us both good. When you are having a bad day, know that my smiles mean I care about you, and it’s meant to lift you.
  • Don’t be a liar – about ANYTHING! I appreciate honesty, above all else. If you are honest, we will always find a way through together.
  • Recognize that every individual on this planet is a human being, including yourself and deserves respect just for that fact alone, regardless of their race, religion, color, gender, sexual preference, political beliefs, or the country where they originated. Maybe then we could look forward to some of that World Peace that beauty contestants speak of during the interview segment.
  • If you can help someone when they need it – DO IT! Giving to someone in his or her hour of defeat is the best gift you can give, every time.
  • Read, learn, listen. Take every opportunity to educate yourself about your world. You are a human being who lives on this planet and in this society. Your understanding of how it works and runs contributes to it running better, for all of us.
  • Please make choices in your life that benefit you, not hurt you. ALL of us deserve a good experience on this earth. I care about you.
  • If you make a mistake or have done something wrong that causes hurt – big or small – take ownership of it, feel genuine remorse and say “I’m Sorry” like you’ll never do it again. Forgiveness feels right for both of us.

Looking at these bullet points now, it feels appropriate to expect these things of others for my well-being. But when I look at my relationships, in general, it seems to challenge people to give these most basic elements. I don’t understand why we wouldn’t want to create harmony over distress.

Then I look at it from the flip-side – am I one hundred percent doing these things for other individuals? And I have to say, no honestly. There are a couple of statements on this list that I’ve periodically had a hard time doing. I’ll leave it to you to decide where you think I’ve fallen. I will say that when I stumble, it’s because of this human ego.

All I ask is that people do their best and maybe remember to keep their ego in check. And I’ll match their efforts. At this stage in my life, I’m more determined than ever to be that person I expect others to be. Something I would never have conceived of doing in my youth.

Here’s to maturity!

Presence

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Lucid Being – Ash D. Solomon

I hope it’s in me to show. And may it not be seen as arrogance.

It is a joy to meet someone with clued-in confidence or have an appearance of understanding. The bonus is to see their demeanor coupled with an in-depth genuineness about the portrayal of who they are. These characteristics of being in the world are what I aspire to emulate. Individuals with presence don’t need to take anything away from those that surround them. They are complete in their existence. 

To possess presence is to have the gift of inspiration. These encounters give us a tool to grow internally, just the same as life experiences can be our teachers. To do and be better, correct past mistakes to ensure they don’t happen again and guide us to a more secure reaction to future events, this is growth.

When people recognize this kind of presence, it’s a comfort and with it, are fluently engaged. Someone with the power to inspire, immersing themselves in higher ideals for all, imparting information, and sharing it willingly – this quality of presence does so unfailingly for the betterment of others. 

I hope it’s in me to show. 

Language Of Woods

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One concrete block aligned to the next and the next, each step taken
slapping hard with echoes, the grunts of strangers bouncing against me
in an unnatural way. Grey energy sticking on my clothes, smudging in deeper,
my emptiness reflected on the faces of passers-by.

An escape seems justified, the planning begins. It’s a want and a need,
a timely effort when the world begins to close in. Taking care of this essence
keeps my head in the game in the race of the plastic, commercial, and material world.
It’s beyond time to reclaim some sanity, punching out now.

Every remembered hue in the musty yellow, brown, and green of the woods
beckons me with its message of calm, reminding me of blanketing comfort
in every step taken deep into the center of her being. I can already hear
Mother Nature celebrating my return.

My arrival at the entrance to my freedom has the wind layering around me with the softest of invisible hands. I lean in with a heavy sigh, forcing out the dust and mange of the city streets. Breathing slowly, feeling the pulse return to normal as peace filters in between all the cells in my body.

I focus my eyes on the crispness of leaves underfoot as I step deeper into the heart of Mother. The beams of sunlight entering through the swaying canopies of the treetops redirect my attention, eminent trails of rays capturing every bit of forest dust in its stream, emulating the rings of Saturn on a smaller scale.

My preening tender ears usher in the rich sounds of nature – whistles of the wind, harmonies of feathered friends, and the high-pitched sounds of clicks, buzzing, rasping – all steadily burrowing the rhythm of nature into the grey matter of my brain.
Its steady pulse of harmony makes me richer for having heard her sounds.

Stealthily, my feet burrow into the soft mud, a reminder of a youthful past
and carefree days, with an intense urge to push in deeper. Home was offering
its hello, brown wetness oozing firm yet squishy brown missiles of clay up in
between my white toes. Small twigs prick the little piggies sinking in, becoming one.

I solemnly brush my hand on the moistness of the green moss covering
the holy tree. My fingers etch along the cracks with thankfulness for its gift
of renewal even as the crackle of old limbs signals a forthcoming demise.
I wonder if Mother nature mourns the losses as she makes me come alive.

This oft-visited place of tranquility, a site of refuge and healing is where joy
comes back. I dare not disturb, ruffle or destroy what only offers peace. I’ve imbibed necessarily and deliriously in the majestic feel of these woods, experienced my internal essence revived with the esoteric fuel of nature. She spoke and I listened.

My Other Babies

Writing pieces for publication is like having children.

Each one I give birth to (write) will be nurtured (reviewed & edited) until it is grown-up (complete). Then I reluctantly let it go out into the world (publish it). My hope is that it is written well enough to have an impact on the world in a positive way.

My descendants (inspired audience) will continue the good that was started with just an idea or brief thought to hopefully make this world a better place.

May my legacy (my other babies) be remembered well.

Originally posted at Susi’s Soap Box 6/5/2013