Tag: loss

Grief-Sicken

Published on by Susi Bocks29 Comments
woman standing on large gray rock along body of water
Ivan Karasev – Unsplash

the monumental woes
sudden jolts to the psyche
a shock of endless wounding ripples
splintering into a cascade of emotions
gigantic internal rifts open in us

flayed open in a jagged void

our mind, body and soul
doing the symbiotic dance of intense unease
putrid words heat up inside needing purged
they force themselves up and out unintelligibly
hot screamed tears flow down anguished cheeks

our reality forever changed

in time we hush our voice to gutteral moans
the liquid from our eyes slows to a trickle
the suffering seals us up within ourselves
and the sadness clings to every fiber in our being
arthritic pain felt everywhere there are no bones

living is hard

Perpetual Pain

Published on by Susi Bocks53 Comments
red and white petaled flowers painting
Debby Hudson – Unsplash

Inspired by Reena’s Exploration Challenge #190 – Insanity
&
Eugi’s Weekly Prompt – Unforgotten

no one told me
the days of mourning
linger for years

those unforgotten bring us
more bitter than sweet memories
unexpectedly and forcefully

it rises up within us
tears well and overflow incessantly
this insanity of grief, tortuous

when you love hard
you hurt more
death really kills two people


Reblog – Piece by Weronika Donovan

Published on by Susi Bocks3 Comments

How many of us have gone through this feeling of lost connections? Too many, I fear. When I first read this piece, it reminded me of a favorite song of mine – Lost on You by LP. It’s the same message – loss of a connection. Weronika echoed that song but compressed the sentiments into this exquisite short piece. Bravo!

Painted Poems

In that moment
I felt that
there is a piece
a piece of me
which I’ve missed
which cannot be found.
By me
by you
by anybody.
A piece that was lost
many years ago
amid desert’s sands
of our relationship.

© W. Donovan

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Wrong Sex

Published on by Susi Bocks17 Comments
blue and pink textile in close up photography
Sharon McCutcheon – Unsplash

with shame i hide
within the norms of society
disguising, even to myself,
my true desires

our friendship turning romantic
confuses me further
your charisma enchanting me
your song lifting my spirits

what a mind
smart, decisive and creative
your care and concern
envelops me decisively

the air around you
light
smoothing these edges of mine
adjusting my rough attitude

my mother loves you
as do i
but can this love sustain
with this private dilemma

i think i desire men

This is in response to Val’s request for poetry for National Poetry Month Scavenger Hunt aka NPM 21. The piece above is about a lost love.

The Light Inside

Published on by Susi Bocks23 Comments
GoranH – Pixabay

Inspired by Sadje’s What do you see #76 & VJ’s Weekly Challenge – Nesting

every bit of you
held bright sunshine
layered within your being was goodness
your presence, a sanctuary

every thought, every utterance
nesting inside of a grander one
your skin barely containing
the magnanimity of your being

your touch soothed us
your embraces signaled healing
and our lives were made richer
having known you

Reblog – You Are No Longer Mine by Angelique Rose

Published on by Susi Bocks6 Comments

Haven’t we all been here at one point in time?

Never Silence the Madness

I read somewhere

That you were no longer mine

.

.

That you finally opened up your heart

And honestly, It was about time

.

.

I read somewhere

That you no longer belonged to me

.

.

That our memories

Are no longer cherished

It’s not my heart that holds your key

.

.

I never expected you to wait forever

To hide away

And pine for my love

.

.

But I read somewhere

That you are finally happy and moved on

.

.

My heart paused a little

It broke for a moment

As I remembered what we lost

.

.

But I always knew that our love

Was gone

When I walked away

I knew the cost

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Reblog – Coping. by Nancy Botta

Published on by Susi Bocks5 Comments

Loss, whether death or the end of a great love affair, can haunt us for eternity. And muddy our existence until we heal. This is one of those pieces that just gets you right in the heart. Thanks, Nancy.

Rusted Honey

You left for some time
ages ago
long enough to haunt,
long enough for everything
loud and living
to sink into itself,
a cavity beneath waves…

but I’m OK now—
day drinking with Nemesis
laboring rust and dirt,
I lie with your bones
and start fires at night.

© Nancy Botta, 2020

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Tender Greetings

Published on by Susi Bocks19 Comments
bare tree on lake during daytime
@whoisbenjamin – Unsplash

on overcast days
echoing my sorrow
a return to the place
where we found sanctuary

would that speaking in whispers
be heard by you, my love
in hopes of solace
that perhaps it would ease my despair

in this vast emptiness without you
for you departed much too soon
life without your presence, lonely
emptiness now my constant companion

would that you returned here
discovering the utterances of my soul
clinging to the branches
waiting to be spoken to your heart

Your Days

Published on by Susi Bocks25 Comments
Inspired by VJ’s Weekly Challenge #122 – The Phone Call
& Sadje’s What do you See #57

it was coming
i knew it with certainty
and distractions from the truth
failed me

when the phone call came
i braced myself in steely opposition
hardening my body against the cruel words
i was about to hear

she’s dead

only screams of sorrow
and heavy sobs of tears escaped me
i was now in a world
which felt empty and hollow

her eagerness to listen
her kind and gentle ways gone
the smiles and caring on her face
would happen no more

i pushed the receiver from my ear
as if to push away the truth
but knowing that mourning had begun
a new reality, one hard to face

feeling empty without her presence
i was born into a lonely place
her voice and body only in memories now
i miss her grace, her love and her acceptance

time took forever to heal the loss i felt
the place in my heart where she took up residence
darkened, and shriveled up
the air thicker as i inhaled only tears

the light she shone came to an end
but the warmth she gave continues
i always try to celebrate the day she was born
but the day she left, i mourn

#Whatdoyousee
Image Credit – Angéle Kamp @ Unsplash

I thank VJ and Sadje for inspiring thoughts of my special friendship. Guess I needed a good cry today. I dedicate this piece to Bana – a wonderful human being and such a catalyst for good – she will always be remembered with a smile and a tear.