Cold-hearted

despair

My guard is up.

Feeling dark emotions now

because of your acts.

 

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And in that moment of forced togetherness
I felt like the boy eating off the filth of a paper city
I realised I’m forcing the same trash through my heart
In craving to be someone’s priority

Vasvi Gupta – excerpt from Reversed Smiles

Find the specific details on why you loved this person, and it’s okay to find yourself still loving this person, but you have to see that these qualities do exist with a person who’s waiting for you, who’s even willing to give you more.

Let go of the fantasy. Loss is a good place to love yourself more and work on forgiving yourself more. 

Baby, don’t think that the time you spent with that person was lost for it has prepared you for this very moment, our conversation here.

Heartache may lead to the suicide of the mind but never of the soul.

 – excerpt from Every Woman

We’re not special, not like before.

I don’t fucking like you anymore.

Was before even all that? Was it even real?

You catapulted your heart and adoration away to another.

I transport back to emotions I was forced to leave behind. Aching for them.

Support is not commitment when your lover suffers subtle degrees of rejection.

Your focus was where it shouldn’t have been.

Layers of my strength came undone with your carelessness.

I was livid. I was lost.

I am lost, and still here.

Now what?

End of Bliss

 

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anasty44

Love, becoming one.

Intensity together.

Then pain. Two again.

 

**The image prompted a reliving of my personal moment but click here for what inspired the artist to create this beautiful sculpture. Click here to see another perspective of the moving version.

 

Perfidy

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“You presumed to decide what was best for me. Even if I resolve the anger,  the pain you caused, I can’t trust you. Ever. I’m standing before a stranger.”

Raymond Reddington – The Blacklist

 

Same sentiment, different situation.

The judgment of that line from a script mimics life. My life.

Ever so dramatically, flashing sensations of Oof, suffering, the feelz surround me.

Waves drowning me, on dry land.

The imagination drawn to retribution, naturally.

But who would it serve?

I’d still be alone.