Just Wrecked

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once safe and sound
our motion
jostling harmoniously
clicketing along predictably

but that train
left the station
leaving a trail of debris
in the crash

reeling emotions screech
as the brakes are put on
full stop
the damage is extensive

such a jagged mess
to clean up
but the nugatory efforts
fail

Unscrewed

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The battles began, never thinking we’d be
in a place where it felt all sucked out, with intense
feelings of acrimony letting the warmth
of what was dissipate, argument by argument.

Guilty waves coursed like an electric current,
me for the kids, you for your sins. Playing
at normal became the norm while the years
of neglect and lack of focused attention

skewed the connection. Then like a burnt-out bulb,
the energy waned. We imploded and made the pfft sound,
blowing out what once was from the core, the place
we drew strength from, where we imagined a bright future

sustaining us, our glow enriching the space,
giving off substance and volume, where like
an energy-efficient model, we thought
it’d be a while until our end. Till death do us part.

We’d be bright for an eternity that in actuality
would never come. It was clear the light
had gone out, the spark never to return
nor brighten our way. It was time to slowly

remove ourselves from this home thought of as permanent
where we had fastened ourselves into, letting go and moving on,
feeling drained and used up. Made to be undone, nothing is forever
but the hope was there once, shining brightly before it burned out.

Teaching Moments

1

it’s annoying
and disappointing
you vow one thing
and do another

where is the care
you promised
i count on it
only to be let down

i gave you
too much credit
trusting you
to do your one job

fulfilling the deed
you signed up for
i should be able
to believe you’d deliver

“My word is my bond!” you said
that commitment
was and is
bullshit

things get
out of hand
you expect me
to pick up the pieces

like i always do
like an obedient servant
dutifully
avoiding defeat

but in the end
i
take the hit
this party’s over

It’s Lacking

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this on-again
off-again affair
it’s all just practicing
at the grown-up table

the repetition of the immature
the relationship nostrum
of the stupid
hot-cold-over, hot-cold-over

the connection fails
time and time again
when the heads in the game
are unequipped to love properly

I Lose, I Triumph

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i was worthy
of a better, happier life
than you deemed
i was going to live

every time
my name
comes up
i hope
you choke on it
with irritation

that’s what you deserve
a lifelong
aversion
to the utterance
of what once
so effortlessly
came across your lips

i hope
it makes
your body
fill with pins and needles
whose friction
tears you up
on the inside

you
the creator
of your destruction

i walk away
comfortably
knowing
you’ll bleed
from the inside

i
am better
without you

**Originally published in Feeling Human Dec 2017. Presented here with revisions.