Necessary Rituals

 

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A sudden weariness takes hold of me.

Yawns escape with more frequency as the battle to fight them begins.

And the nightly ritual starts again.

I shut down the lights in the room and head in the direction of the soft place.

The companion water bottle and cell phone walk with me.

One last bathroom trip to empty the bladder and guide the toothbrush around in my mouth. A vigorous spit and done.

My clothing flies into the hamper, my glasses land on the makeup table.

Getting closer.

I delicately walk towards the bed avoiding the edges, protecting my toes.

I made it, sinking down into the cushiness of my bed. Ahhhh escapes my lips.

Just a few more things to do before I can meet the sandman again.

In pops the nighttime medication to do its work.

One last check on the cell phone. It’s off and charging.

Snuggling in to find the sweet spot which will comfort me best. It doesn’t take long.

Finally, I close my eyes and take a deep breath.

Slowly, my breathing finds an even pace.

And I begin to trail off in this life to end up in another.

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Painful Confusion

2

Shocking upheaval delivered unexpectedly.

The heartache pounded harshly inward.

Internal distress burnt a tortuous red.

A deep cut surrounded by a million small tears.

The stress widened all the wounds.

Anguish and heartbreak followed.

The future, unending and suffering agony.

Sorrow and grief dictated the next steps for survival.

This daedal misery mimicked a slow death.

Love left in a upset heap, an untidy disarray of hurt.

This… this from someone who cherished commitment.

Fire And Ice

fire and ice

The fire in you warms me.
My coolness keeps you from burning to a crisp.

Manage my happiness! 

But my needs are subject to your approval.
Navigating your ego is treacherous.

Peace and quiet, no conflict!

There’s no room for mine.

Cast Aside

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It’s cold and lonely next to you.
Freezing.
What to do, to break through?
Open up.
Let me in.

I can’t.
I hurt because of you.
You lied.
I cried.
Then I died.

I’ll change.
I promise.
You deserved better.
I know that now.
I’m sorry.
Please forgive me.

No.