Redux
my past returns
up in my future
like hot juice
down my throat
it burns
this becomes something else
tainted and wrong
desperate attempts
at rising above
at feeling less defiled
sullied and broken
once again
first time, shame on him
second time, shame on me
a third time won’t happen
Originally posted 4/14/2019 on I Write Her.
let down your guard, friend
a hardened exterior
keeps the truth at bay
happy or sobbing
wearing a frown and a smile
bathtime or deluge
it was concealed rage
coming apart at the seams
feared discovery
Redux
this rage pouring forth
an explicit emotion
directed at you
Originally posted here on I Write Her – 2/19/2019.
Redux
another heartache
the drama du jour
feels like the crisis of a lifetime
pounded down by hardship again
residing in a personal hell
oh, what a fresh, hot mess
it’s a lifelong process
a roller coaster of emotions
learning to traverse the pain
facing the trepidation
yet again, overcoming the angst
the release must come
a torrential outpour
of pooled fear
a flood of wet anxiety
thin, clear lines of human sap
so many streams of liquid frustration
until it finishes
after the purge feeling
lost and light-headed
slightly dazed
still riding the after-shocks
mostly exhausted
hope blossoms again
it’s the duty of tears
they lay the groundwork
for repair
to an injured psyche
needing to become rational again
Originally posted 2/18/2019 here on I Write Her.
Redux
i’m not the enemy
wrong
you were never a friend
friends will…
listen
offer a shoulder to cry on
give tissues as needed
nurture
be excited to be with you
tell the truth
protect
support
engage
comfort
laugh with you
act like your #1 fan
shield you from oncoming shit
be ready and waiting
me having to stand up for myself
and up to you
proved once and for all
you were never willing
to give what should have
come so naturally
Originally posted 2/11/2019, here on I Write Her.
Redux
cloistered
surrounded by many
the raw emotions
remain inside
oh, if only
one could
unfetter
and spew
there’s safety
remaining hidden
but danger
staying shushed
mental health
physical health
all in crisis
because of silence
what will it take
to emerge
to purge
to break free
Originally posted 1/21/2019 on I Write Her.
Inspired by What do you see #247
everything inside
it’s jumbled
the thoughts align
temporarily
coherently
then incoherently
emotions turn on
churn every which way
i feel quite a mess
holding it all together
Inspired by What do you see #221
the terror seemed very exaggerated
fake almost
the volume of ire was inflated
filled completely
the love language of sweet nothings extinct
non-existent
the presentation is out of proportion
not reality
art imitating life
yet life is an art
I Write Her 