Redux
I
cannot
have you suck
the life from me.
My own deep wounds need some attention now.
Tag: emotions
Dusk In My Soul
Redux
I’ve gone dark.
Could be my pants, shirt, socks, underwear or bra, but rest assured, dark will be somewhere on my body. As dark on my skin as dark as my insides.
It will remind me to get back to the emotions that were lost and fragmented. The good ones that shattered, and then scattered everywhere; becoming thin and almost non-existent. Seems odd, doesn’t it? To select gloom to inspire me after it tore me apart first. It’s my visual sticky note of what I let happen to me. It’s what I must do in order to go on. Otherwise, I don’t think I would.
Every emotion that came at me… shook me… HARD.
I’m scared being left with the impression of nothing being good, ever again.
“See the light in others, and treat them as that is all you see.”
Dr. Wayne Dyer
That’s hard when…
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Skilled Response Required
Redux
I’ve always said humans are both – detrimentally stupid and utterly complicated.
The wide variety of situations we find ourselves in and the sheer volume of inappropriate choices we make, show us time and time again we are. We depend on our feelings and instinct, and then stupidity inevitably makes an appearance. Full-on reaction mode.
The best stance to take in all complicated situations is to clearly and calmly reflect on what the hell occurred to create this current tizzy. Determining the next best, logical step to take would be most prudent.
It’s the guaranteed solution for less stupidity.
Complicated is a permanent state.
You’ll still need to buckle up.
Churning
with tumult laying siege
the agitation taking hold
our vulnerability appears
sink or swim?
Next
Redux
And in that moment of forced togetherness
I felt like the boy eating off the filth of a paper city
I realised I’m forcing the same trash through my heart
In craving to be someone’s priorityVasvi Gupta – excerpt from Reversed Smiles
Find the specific details on why you loved this person, and it’s okay to find yourself still loving this person, but you have to see that these qualities do exist with a person who’s waiting for you, who’s even willing to give you more.
Let go of the fantasy. Loss is a good place to love yourself more and work on forgiving yourself more.
Baby, don’t think that the time you spent with that person was lost for it has prepared you for this very moment, our conversation here.
Heartache may lead to the suicide of the mind but never of the soul.
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Shift Happens
each valued experience
a perspective ours alone
an interpretation through our lens
our brains imbue us with shading
while simultaneously seeking order
giving our perspective a well-rounded notion of things
we attach value
based on reflective assumptions
each interaction can fill us, leave us feeling defeated…
…and every other shift on the spectrum of human experience
In Pain
~*~*~
~*~*~
in silent shelter
minimizing what we expose
we cry and ache
but sometimes
it becomes necessary
to combine a consonant and a vowel
shedding light on our pain
it eases the burden we carry
that which shackles us from change
~*~*~
~*~*~
Cloud Hurt
Redux
I’ve been on #9.
It was amazing. For awhile.
Was too young to know it might end badly.
Fooled by the soft and comfortable.
Got pushed off. Hard.
Too stupid on how to deal.
Fuck Cloud 9.
The landing was excruciating.
Turbulence
human feelings rise
their natures take over
emotions now rule
Purging
Redux
Explaining My Depression to My Mother: A Conversation by Sabrina Benaim
A most productive exclamation of feelings.
For the delivery of, but also being a witness to.
I was reminded how emotional outbursts can be an easing of my burden.
After existence becomes too much, sometimes only rage and tears
can get me back to center.
I Write Her 