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not gonna lie
this limited life experience
gives us some happiness

feeling free in our youth
fun with our friends
getting our bearings

but it’s not always so
we aren’t always so lucky
as evidenced in monstrous curve balls

the older we get
the harder it becomes
to navigate in some semblance of peace

happiness eludes us
negligible moments of comfort
in between the waves of pain

as contentedness is yearned
survival and self-preservation
locks in and takes hold of us

we despair and hope for ease
uttering a cry to be left unharmed
to remain untouched by the sorrows of life

looking back on it all
happiness is elusive and fleeting
the joys felt just dull the anguish

life is hard
life isn’t pretty
but when it’s filled with love, it’s better

28 thoughts on “Assessment

  1. I love the piece, though I’m bent the other way. I’ve gotten happier the older I get. Not from picking up more denial, though by the Songs of Experience of life and an, “Oh, somebody wants to play” — instead of fight. Everything that has happened to me or that I’ve allowed to happen — never blame the victim — has brought me to one place. The perpetual present. Right here, night now, always.

    The “life is hard” reminds me of two experiences:
    ~ The 1st was in central Mexico in the summer when I was about 7 or 8. Summers in San Miguel de Allende at the Instituto. We were heading to the Temple of the Sun God pyramid with 6 of us in a Toyota Corona. It had to be over 100 degrees, I sitting on my Stepmom’s lap up front, Dad driving, and Step-Nonny and 2 Aunts in back. We were lost. I was out of my mind frustrated, couped up, Nope able to do anything about it, and sweating. Helplessness that was soon to be relieved. My Dad tried to mitigate it, “Ahhhh Jordan, it’s an adventure.” I’ll never forget when my Stepmom told me that story, reminding me of it. “Jordan, your eyes were spitting nails when you turned to Jim and indefatigably said, ‘It’s NOT and adventure. It’s just hard!’ I at first thought you were going to eat him, so beautifully animal Natural.“

    ~ Experience 2? Voltaire. Hearing Voltaire’s response, well, reading it. Felt like I heard it, though. Someone once commented to Voltaire, “Life is hard.” He chuckle-chortled back, “Compared to what?!”

    Thanks much for the piece, for your language prompting memories of strength. My own and another.

    Liked by 1 person

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